Yeah sometimes
you look up and see colours in the windows of people
who used to be like you
who used to be human
fire in the chimney
fire in the holes in the wall
flowing water from the broken boiler
and clouds over the scrapyard
and sounds emanating
postulating
ingratiating
significance and matter
and singular pluralism
yeah sometimes
you can hear the beating of drums
as the blue liquid seeps from the pipes in the ceiling
yeah sometimes
you can hear foxes dabbling
with mirrors and that
and seeking re-assurance from their ancestors, cling to apple cores
yeah sometimes
there’s a moon overhead and it makes the chains of light dance
but someone is being sick
or you hear
through the door
through the door
a diagnosis
and someone’s car being broken into
and someone’s life savings being nicked
and several swing bands blaring under lamplight
someone demanding a table at the restaurant after one too many
while someone else’s corpse is dragged from the murk
and someone starves in an abandoned abattoir
you can hear a room full of 14 people sobbing simultaneously
yeah sometimes
you can hear the TV and they’re watching a channel
but when you look yourself you can never figure out what the channel was
but blood makes bloody mess so
you can hear kids opposite screaming
because they’ve melted a bit in the heat and have fused with their plastic toys
but the parents don’t wanna call an ambulance
cos the kids love their toys so much
so just let it play out in agonising carnage
just let it play out
and the kids are screaming next door
and now they’ve got a dog to eat their dreams
do you ever
You know it’s a game of survival
with no money
and no job
and three kids
and big debt
for big data
for small soul
in abyssal space
long night of mum in the front room with Uncle Fred
long night of
abyssal sun in slow motion
yeah sometimes
the threads holding up the city
on the back of a white wolf chasing the moon
shudder cos someone twangs em just right
and someone throws a bottle down an alley
and someone cuts a bouncer through the teeth
and someone else is selling teeth
yeah sometimes
I look through someone’s window and see myself standing there
and I think
that’s not right
and hear the waves and it makes wanna break in to check
but the police will come
the police are coming
the police will come
and they’ll crawl up to us
coppers come to chop and chop the block
and birth the instinct and
you tell one to fuck off and they take it
you tell another to fuck off and they threaten to arrest you
cos your friend walked too close to you
like centipedes with human teeth
below the concrete countless jazz clubs shake the pavement
underwater submarines filled with
secret meetings for secret company portfolios
and producers deciding what films they’ll make
and designers deciding what’s hot
because the index for beauty
is a straight line
the chocolate is melting
on paper planes
because there’s a string instrument playing overhead
there’s too much smog
I can’t breathe because of all the crows
All the telephone wires
All the shopping trolleys
All the neon glare
All the masks
All the erections
All the cyanide poisonings
All the meat
All the night sky
All the crows
All the bloody sangria
All the lager
All the smoke
All the powder
All the ale
All the lager
All the sirens
All the bombs
All the machinations
All the spirits
All the black holes
All the dusty currency
All the transactions
All the digital mating calls
All the whistling
All the sewer folk
All the hospitals
All the silver pendants
All the wolves
All the lager
All the crows
All the shipping forecasts
All the somnambulists
All the police
All the police people
All the police people’s families
All the lanterns in the swamp
All the TV presenters
All the out of tune voices
All the kids
All the kids
All the kids
All the kids
All the houses and
All the kids and
All the lights and
All the waves and
All the crows
All the crows
All the time and
All inside me
All the crows next to
All the people having dinner parties in bombed out dining rooms
restaurant critics sit in empty halls eating rats and snarling
theatres put on shows with no light and no audience
people go shopping in airbase hangars for ritual pleasure
people go fishing in the flooded ruins of the suburbs
folk go walking in the fires of the inner city
they rock empty cradles
and feed corpses with bacon
they dig graves for nobody
and pull teeth that aren’t there
they let off fireworks for no reason
and talk about the price of milk when all they drink is muck
they get pissed on Saturday night
as if anyone knows what day it is
they dance together in the red,
Yellow
Orange
Blue lights under neon moon
and electric koi carp winking
they dance together in antique halls falling apart
in rust and cracks and rotting gardens
they dance under a chandelier that has somehow remained intact
in the glow of a frantic twilight
in irradiated dust and clusters of crows
in overgrown carparks and ballrooms infested with spiders
drowning in sour lager
they dance in endless cycles
of concentric circles
unravelling all of reality until the chandelier crashes
and all the lights go out
and the city will be blown away
and they dance
but we have life and we need to preserve that
because doing things for the best is what adults do
and we are the adults
who cook pork and charge batteries
and the world won’t give us nothing
so we have to take it
take it
that’s how it is
that’s how
we’re the ones who make planes
who make airports
who make glass
who create order thrust from primordial woodland
who enlighten
who build churches
who cast shadows on continents
who make banks
and microwaves and
holistic principles
and
dialectics
and
none of that none of that
quantum mechanics
and
Sibelius’ tunes
and
none of that
all the stars
and
all the radiance of the sun
and
ancient insects
and
cures for cancer
cancerous insects
yeah sometimes
you listen next to the door in the house that you grew up in
and you hear a saxophone blaring through the night
and you turn around and see a little boy walking
and you wonder how
how did he
how is he surviving
yeah sometimes
I shake because I need another spoonful
and I shake because I’m into it less but I need a
I think I need a
I need a monolith
I need a monolith
it’s about being blue
cos the police are coming
the bureau are coming
yeah sometimes
sometimes
sometimes
sometimes
I think we should let the whole malignant thing play out to its end.




September 3, 2020 at 7:32 pm
It’s good to connect with you and thank you for following Eugi’s Causerie I.
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November 6, 2020 at 9:31 pm
wow! the imagery in this piece is overwhelming… i love the claustrophobic feel you create, the quick phrases like bullets that don’t ricochet. but these words and images dance… so good! love your style.
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November 9, 2020 at 8:02 pm
I’m really glad, it took a while to write actually, was just formed form loads of phrases and sentences I jotted down over a long period that eventually became the poem. I’m very glad you’ve enjoyed the writing, thank you! x
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